A sketch or two, and a dog

Audition update.

The past week has been filled with submitting for auditions and managing to book a few. Last Sunday I auditioned for Ken Turrel’s theater company, Where Eagles dare to…something something. He has a little festival of original works coming up at the end of October. Usually I loathe original works because anybody and everybody is thrown up there with a few words scratched out as a script. But I figured, why not. Work is work, right?

So I go to the initial audition and forget my headshot. Every time I audition for something at Ripley-Grier Studios I forget my headshot and resume. Never fails. Well, I auditioned. With a monologue from a MeatLoaf Album. Yes that’s right, Meatloaf. I realized I don’t have many contemporary comic monologues. And those I do have memorized aren’t that funny. So I went in, did my thing and left.

Who woulda thought I got a call back. In fact, I was called back to play the character of ‘Dog’ in a two person show about the relationship between a human and their dog. It’s physical and quick. At least, the section of the piece I read for the call back was. I was the only one who read for dog up against everyone. So now I just wait and see. It was one of those things where the director said, ‘obviously I’m looking at you for the part.’ Yeah, I’ve never trusted that and never well. Too many things happen and there are too many factors that come into play at the last minute. Its physical, so at least I got that going for me.

The other audition was for Happy Hour, no not the happy hour clowns…one can dream. But instead for this sketch-esque late-night comedy show that is from what I could come up with, also part cabaret. It is located WAY down on the LES and Ave C. Too far from any trains really. But we went in, were given some basic ‘choreography’ and every one went thru the same routine. It was really easy, really basic. The kinda stuff that appeals to ½ drunken crowds. It’s all very base humor, but is there anything better than base humor? Only problem is that they rehearse right in the middle of the day. The same time all of us struggling actors are trying to eek out a living so we can eat, do laundry and pay rent.

Again, like all things in this business….we shall see.

EYE CANDY

So as you know, Eye Candy is doing some amzing things at the Fringe.

We're headed towards our final two performances this weekend, the 25th and 26th. But this past weekend we were reviewed and I am here to boast and show off my first official NY Review.

To read all reviews visit: NY Theatre

To read this one online visit: EYE CANDY Review

and for info about our last 2 performances go here: Maria Colaco Dance

EYE CANDY

reviewed by Komail Aijazuddin

You are not good enough as you are. It's a hard pill to swallow, but it's true. You're about fifty pounds, three minor surgeries, and one Nobel Prize away from being everything you can be, or so you suspect. For anyone who has been on a date—hell, for anyone who has walked down Broadway on a Saturday morning shining with stares and judgment, EYE CANDY is not to be missed.

With the dating checklist expanded to include rocky abs and buns that defy physics, this funny and engaging modern dance performance takes a candid look at the ever-challenging search for a mate. Created and choreographed by the immensely talented Maria Colaco, the piece hacks away at relationship protocol, vocabulary, and ritual to present us with a wholly unique and endlessly hilarious view of what we do on the prowl for love. Colaco has mixed modern dance with dramatic theatre, and the result never bores. Her direction is confident, daring, and refreshingly unexpected. Interactive without being intrusive, the show will stun you with how many times you'll see your own past being acted out for you. Each initial stare, stifling relationship, and bad breakup is immediately accessible and presented without pretension. The script is hilarious and its structured extremely well thought-out.

The cast, which includes Colaco herself, works well together. They are talented, well-trained, and a joy to see. Billy Keiffer and Patrick Pizzolorusso are particularly enchanting, easily commanding the audience's attention whenever on stage. Though ultimately a comedy, EYE CANDY is infused with some serious dramatic segments that stun and impress in equal measure. Specifically watch out for Pamela Ralat, whose tearful and disturbing monologue towards the end of the performance is deeply touching. Each cast member inhabits a stereotype of sorts from the onset: Divas, Lovers, Pimps, Hotties all frolic in unison and this with other simple but effective theatrical tools adds to the complexity of this performance. The dance pieces themselves are beautiful, striking, and meaningful and range from sinewy ensemble numbers to sensual fits of fan kicks and cigarette holders.

EYE CANDY strips dating to its underwear and parades it before us in a way that is not only consistently entertaining but also introspective. It provokes, above all else, thought. Thoughts about body image, cruelty, love, compassion, lust, sex, drama, ambition, the superficial and the prophetic. And occasionally about how fat you are. Then again, there is always the Nobel Prize.

Back in the Saddle Again

It has been an awefully long time since I posted and I apologize. But my time has not been spent slacking off I assure you all.

Currently I am unemployed. Thank god that I have always had a knack for saving money. Even though I am entering a month of no work, I don’t mind. I do so willingly because I have been auditioning non-stop for the past several weeks and I love it!

My last few auditions have been nothing short of…entertaining.

The first one I went one was a general dance call for La Cage Aux Folles. Now here I am thinking, “there is nothing else going on, sure I can go out for a dance call, after all I’ve been in a modern show and I’m working on another piece now.” Yeah, not so much. You try dancing for two hours in characters shoes. I am, howver, proud that I managed to make it through the whole thing and didn’t screw up nearly as much as I thought I would. The director at least liked my character choice of the ‘Special’ dancer. I was give the compliment of “fierce” legs, something to be proud of. I have acquired a new respect for all those women out there who work the chorus. It is not an easy job.

Aside from submitting like a click happy fiend I have also gone on a few film/commercial auditions. This short film is being done by an NYU student. Now I know it’s a student film, but I figured it’s a good place to start building up film credits. The premise is very juvenile and unoriginal, a spoof on the Real World. Their special twist is a house full of famous literary characters. I auditioned for Hamlet..big stretch. But I know when I left that I nailed it. Sadly I will be unable to be a part of the piece because we’ll be out of town. VACATION! (But I did get called back)

This past week I auditioned for a Dunkin Donuts Commercial. I was first to arrive in the morning, so that means I was the first in and the first out. Such a breeze, not to mention fun! The idea is to show the world that DDs has coffee as well as tastey round pastries. And cheap good coffee at that. Where other places *cough, Starbucks, cough* coffee is looked at more like a status symbol, Dunkin Donuts is the working man’s joe. So there I am carrying on a phone conversation into a coffee cup as my audition. Ahh improv skills. I made them laugh as well. So again, who knows?

Finally, this afternoon I auditioned for a production of Twelfth Night for ACS. I have no idea what that stands for, but the talented and big-hearted Ed referred me to the company so a auditionin’ I went. It was in a very drafty and very cold church on Christopher street during a drizzly afternoon. So, when I got there I was somewhat chilled to the bone. I started out a little rough, but on my third read I made the director laugh and that is always a good thing. Laughter is such a powerful toxin.

The production is this summer in Jersey City, which means for me an hour and forty-five minute commute. Give or take a few minutes. But, it is with a company that comes highly recommended from someone I trust.
All in all, I am happily back in the auditioning game and loving every minute of it.

Odd things you see on the way to an audition

“Never leave home without your Camera.” I am so greatful I listened to this one piece of advice for surviving in the city. On a recent trip to the Equity Building in Times Square for an audition I came across yet another oddity about this city. No, it wasn’t the naked cowboy or a random costumed superhero. Nor was it those annoying people selling tickets to comedy shows, “Do you like Comedy?” No, it was dancing.

Latin style dancing in the middle of Times Sq. between a man and his puppet. This life-sized female puppet was atatched to him via special shoes and because of this she appeared to be dancing with him, only contorting her body in ways that no human could ever or would ever do. These antics of course gathered a small crowd, none of whom were willing to get too close to this flailing dancing couple. Of course I snapped a few pictures.

Very Technical Dance move here folks, please don't try this at home.

After a lively performance our talented couple was ushered off by the police for lack of a permit. So of course, when you are done dancing, you pack it away. In this case quite literally. The spry couple sauntered over to a small pile of boxes and the gentleman opened up a suitcase and began folding up his dance partner and packing her away.

Is this how dancers are smuggled in and out of Times Square?

In the Suitcase she goes

And then this charming street urchin who danced his way into our hearts, or something like that, packed up his partner and wandered off to entertain confused onlookers elsewhere.

I say entertain when in all reality its quite frightening. I’ve seen ths performer in Penn Station as well and was extremely freaked out then.

The Oscars are in town and I have Proof

On the corner of 44th and Broadway, right in the heart of Times Square, the usual torrent of passers-by went along their business not even glancing at me and my Camera. I was the only one looking in the window of the ABC studios and snapping photo after photo of the pre-engraved statues.

Those 50 little men smiled up at me saying the oscar goes to you!

Personally I'm not a huge fan of awards shows. Sure they can be entertaining at times. Mainly they are riddled with inside jokes that i simply don't get. I suppose if i kept up with my tabloid reading I'd find them hilarious. I just can't bring myself to put down Vonnegut for a Tabloid. I know, how un-American. Oh well.

Here they are, the little lovelies. I tried for an artistic shot through the panes of glass. I never claimed to be a photgrapher.

Some little known facts about the statue, it was designed a Mr. George Stanley for the academy. Apparently his fee for the commissioned work in 1927 was $500. A steal by our standards. The statue is that of a man standing on a reel of film. In his hands he is holding a sword with the point down.

The first Oscars were made of solid Bronze. During the metal shortage of WWII they were made of plaster. Today they are made of gold-plated britannium. Its not very big, standing 13 inches from head to base and it weighs about 8 Lbs. His official name is the Academy Award of Merit. But we all know him as Oscar.

No one really knows where the nickname came from. For what ever reason, in 1934, a columnist referred to Katherine Hepburn's Award as an Oscar. The name was adopted by the academy in 1939. So there you have it, the history of that covetted little guy.

Here is one last look at the shiny little guy.

For those of you interested, The 78th Academy Awards will be presented on Sunday, March 5, 2006, at the Kodak Theatre at Hollywood & Highland. They will be televised live by onABC beginning at 8 p.m. EST, preceded by a half-hour arrival segment.

Enjoy.

I'm Going to be on Law & Order: SVU!!

Acting work on Law & Order


Today I was lucky enough to be called in for background extra work on Law&Order: SVU. There is nothing glamorous about background work. It is goofy cheesy work and your only job is to fill in the spaces between the professinal actors. However, every striving young actor pays his or her dues as an extra be it in a film or a television series.

The shoot was easy and luckily it was a beautiful New York winter day. Somewhere in the 50 degree area I think. We were cast as a group of protestors complaining about genetically engineered foods. A worthy cause I think. Two of the main female actresses were in this
particular scene.

At this point I should say that I have no idea who they are. I never watch the show. I am not a big TV fan. This, coming from an actor. Funny.

A lot of people, when you tell them you filmed a scene for such and such a show, are impressed and very interested in any details you can provide. Well, I’m sorry. I have no interesting details. It is long, boring work. We do the same scene over and over again. Af few rehearsals no actors. A few with actors. A few with cameras and no actors. A few with everybody. Then they film a few.

After that, we do the same thing, but with a different camera angle. Fun times, huh?
The most enjoyable things about it though are the professional background actors. These are the people that are not going to go anywhere in the business because they choose not to. This is what they do and they have built a whole little world and career around them. There is this whole network of actors who know eachother from doing film and TV background work. They all drop names like Tarantino, and Spielberg. The truth is, you probably could never pick them out in the film since there are so many extras in these things.

We do it because it’s a necessary step in the career of an actor (usually). But these other actors who take it way too seriously are hilarious. They are those people we all come in contact with. The loud, boisterous social butterflys who like to show that they know everyone. One came up to me, gave me a hug and said, “Its so good to see you, how is your wife.”

I’m not married and have never seen this woman before in my life.

So there are the actors like me, getting our minimum wage and hoping this could lead to bigger things, the show off actors who only do background work(because in this little world they feel they are somebody), and then the third group.

This last group is the socially inept group. They try to make jokes, but fail miserably. Examples: I am sitting on a wooden platform with one of these actors waiting for the director to come talk to us. This actor, after some time thinking about this joke, turns to me and says, “we’re sittingon wood.” Then he proceeds to laugh at his well crafted bomb of a joke. Nothing funny about this. But me, idiot that I am, politely chuckle hoping he’ll stop. Nope. This is fuel for his comedic talent and proceeds to fire a bevy of horrible and tasteless jokes at me.

Eventually I am resued by the director only to be placed next to this tall, lanky, somewhat smelly fellow who is railing against Bush, and how the picket signs we are holding were not constructed to the proper code. Excuse me? We were playing hippie protestors…there is no code.

The only real defense…run. As fast as you can, drun away and hope that a casting director or agent or someone in the biz will see you and help you get away from the professional background actors’ politics, and the socially inept actors’ tasteless jokes and annoying rants.

Other than that, I’m gonna be on Law & Order: SVU. The Episode title is INFORMED.
Look for it. I’m the mop-headed actor in the big green military jacket. I’m sure you can see me laughing at all the absurdity around me.