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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

How to bomb an audition

Some days nothing goes right. Things you think you're good at and have a fair amount of confidence in just fall apart.  Today was one of those days.  One of the auditions I've been looking forward to for months was today.  And boy was it an experience.  Possibly the only good thing was that AEA was EMPTY today.  completely empty. Save for ASC of course.

If you want to completely and utterly bomb an audition, just do the exact opposite of what I did and you're sure to knock it out of the park.

I had the privilege of auditioning for ASC, the American Shakespeare Center in Staunton Virginia.


Nice lookin' logo for sure.  Makes you want to work there right?  I know, me too.  So let's see.  What exactly happened.  I'll break it down.
I submitted to the theater.  twice.
Once last fall post auditions because I just wanted my information out there and then again this summer when I saw the notice go out in backstage like a good little classical actor.

I waited...

And received the phone call and email!  Woohoo they were inviting me in.  Most Excellent.  I looked over the information and was very pleased with the way they handle auditions.  They hold group auditions. Everyone in the room together.  You get up, do your monologue in front of everyone, then they hand out sides to quickly poor over and then perform, and then if you have any musical talent..play on.  Some people abhor group auditions like this.  But I feel like I flourish in them.  I much prefer to have people there to play off of rather than you and an auditor scribbling notes while you stare at a spot on the wall.

I have several pieces ready to go, but upon reading the information they provided it seems they would prefer you used a speech from one of the plays in the season.  So I spent time memorizing something that spoke to me. 

LESSON 1:
ALWAYS TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS
My instincts were to use one of the pieces I already have in my actor utility belt.  I felt it would be better to use a piece from one of the season's shows like they preferred, but turns out that didn't matter.  Many people used pieces from other shows.  And my piece was weak.  Not to mention I had to restart once and did that awkward pause dramatically while you search for the word you lost and hope no one notices but everyone notices and it's painful.  You know what I'm talking about.

The next part of the audition went pretty good. At least I feel it did.  I'm fairly good with cold readings and I'm also fairly familiar with Two Gents, so when I was given a side from Two Gents and asked to read the servant Speed I was delighted.  We got laughs.  My audition partner was excellent (also he got a call back so I like to feel like I had some hand in that.  You're welcome friend.  You're welcome.)  They gave us a ton of sides to look over prior to the auditions and this might be the one place where I truly was prepared and went over all of them.

LESSON 2:
ALWAYS PREPARE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE
The sides were extensive. They covered all the plays from the season and you can bet I read them over multiple times.  (secretly hoping I'd get a comic side as I read them)  It's the one aspect of the audition I felt confident in.  That and when I handed in my headshot.  I did a pretty good job with that too.

The last part of the audition is the music section.  Not required, but  if you can play an instrument and or sing then they encourage it.  If you can't play or sing well, don't.  Now I don't sing that great, but I do play guitar well.  So I figured I'd do a fun little song and show off my strummin' and to a song that I could sing effectively.  The theme song from the big bang theory. It's perfect.  Short and sweet, fun chords and picking and fun lyrics.  Well first off, there were 5 guitars in the room.  Skill wise I was on the higher end.  So that made me feel good.  Oh and a flute. A friend of mine brought in her flute and she was amazing.  Actors have so many skills you just never know about. (Heather you played beautifully!)  I however had to freakin restart my song. multiple times.  In fact I never got through it all the way without messing up.

LESSON 3:
DON'T SIKE YOURSELF OUT
I practiced the song.  I watch the show.  I know it.  Music is easy to memorize. (as is verse, but I'm just lame).  But first I couldn't remember the lyrics.."Our whole universe was just big hot mess?" No wait.  That's me in this audition right now.  Let me start over.  Still not getting it.  So I polled my fellow auditioners...what the hell is that line? GOT IT. I tried again..screeched out something.  I kept screwing up and finally just ended the verse with..'Big Bang' and let the G chord ring true.  So that was not fun. Or a good representation of what I can do.

It was just a sad sad mess. For something I've been waiting a while to attend and hopefully land the job, I blew it.  Unless they play the..he's got moxie, did great with the sides, and made everyone laugh and kept going card...I will not be working at ASC this season.  In the end I did it to myself.  I cannot blame anyone else for my craptastic display of skill and talent with verse and lyrics.  

I'm just trying to make myself remember that there will always be another audition.  Sure wasn't the end of my career or anything.  It just sucks when you know you're not going to be getting something you really wanted (like the ASC gig, or any other gig).  When I don't get cast I usually don't care as long as I did well. I was just so incredibly embarrassed today.  I'll get over it and move on.  If anything, when I crash and burn like this it inspires me to work even harder.  Bring on even more early morning calls at AEA!  And now to watch some videos of the muppets to make me laugh....Movin' right along indeed.

4 comments:

  1. Oh no, my friend. I'm so sorry to hear that your audition did not go as well as you wanted it to. I know you really wanted this one.

    But, I love you for posting this. I love you for being so brave. I love you for being so talented. and I love you for having a freakin fantastic sense of humor. Clearly this audition was not an accurate representation of your vast talent, but who knows? A great attitude and the ability to roll with the fuck-ups is a coveted attribute. You never know.

    And I agree with the whole "not learning something new" thing. Every time I try and tailor an audition to what they ask for to a T by learning something new, I very severely regret it. It's hard, though, because you want to do what they ask. However...I agree, stay true to what you know.

    You, my friend, rock. We all know how talented you are, and we've all been there. Keep your head up, watch some muppets and kick the shit outta the next one. Love ya!

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  2. @Sarah, thank you so much for your kind words. It was one of those bad ones. I needed to write it out, drink a bit (and I did) and just breathe and let it go. Took a day or so to do that. Normally I don't let bad auditions effect me, but you know what it's like when it's something you really want.

    Thank you my kind kind friend! I wasn't looking for sympathy when I posted this. Just needed to vent. But I sure appreciate it.

    And now I know better. Go with your gut!

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  3. Don't give it too much thought though. It'll happen a thousand times before you land the role of your life.
    Here's what they have always taught me at various (and very, very good) audition classes I took (and I have to confess it works): never audition to get the part. Always audition to perform and showcase your own strenghts and qualities.
    This means that any monologue you choose, the songs in your repertoire and everything should really tell something important about yourself as a person, while at the same time give you the chance to give a high quality performance.
    I always keep and update my repertoire of monologues, songs, poems, jokes, anecdotes, etc. Only reason why I choose them? I like them, and they reveal sides of my personality.

    Maybe I won't get the part, but damn do I have fun! And damn, I walk out of there knowing that I nailed it, and if they didn't take me, it means they didn't need me.

    I'll post an article on cold readings in a week or so. Stay tuned!
    And thanks for your message.

    Jacopo
    jacopopaoloni.blogspot.com

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  4. @Jacopo, It's good to fail. To utterly crash and burn. In the moment it sucks, but in hind sight you learn so much. I'm one of those that LOVES auditions. I truly treat them as my own little performances. The auditors have no choice but to listen and watch everything I do. I love it. And you're right, if I don't get it, well, it wasn't meant for me, but at least I did my damnedest and booked the room. I just get frustrated when I completely get in my way. I have to say this is probably the worst audition experience I've had in the past almost decade of working as an actor. It happens, but man does it suck.

    Most of my audition pieces are very well prepared and updated often as well. But once in a while something strikes you to try something new. Those gambles have always worked in the past, but this time, I was fighting my instincts. Bad mojo my friend.

    Thanks for reading and commenting! So good to read positive words.

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